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TB.
Posted 2009-12-17 7:34 AM (#22838 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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Full-On SMF

Posts: 88
50101010
Location: ?
Q:What's brown and rhymes with "snoop"?



A:Dr Dre
Jim Hudson
Posted 2009-12-17 2:43 PM (#22845 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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100010010010
Location: Rocking In The Florida Dark !
Poop ?
Jim Hudson
Posted 2009-12-22 7:46 PM (#22980 - in reply to #22845)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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100010010010
Location: Rocking In The Florida Dark !
Dont be BORED !

Edited by Jim Hudson 2009-12-22 7:49 PM
SMF Cyndi
Posted 2009-12-24 2:16 AM (#23004 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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20005001001001001005010
Location: Graveyard BLVD.

This should keep ya buzzzzzzzzzy Limey! lol....what a smartie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txq_BogA1NM&fmt=18


Edited by SMF Cyndi 2009-12-24 2:17 AM
LIMES
Posted 2009-12-29 6:19 PM (#23081 - in reply to #22838)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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10010050
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. 

"In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said.

"You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."

Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates."

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and
asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "These are Carols."
marty
Posted 2009-12-30 4:08 PM (#23085 - in reply to #23081)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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Nearly A Band Member

Posts: 834
500100100100101010
Location: Auchenblae, Scotland
Looks like Santa had a bit of an problem on his way home the other day - luckily he has another 360 days to get over it! ..........................................

Photobucket

Jim Hudson
Posted 2009-12-30 11:37 PM (#23092 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: Bored...not anymore for me !
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100010010010
Location: Rocking In The Florida Dark !
Hey Marty and Limes -- I think its safe to say you guys earned your SMF credencials-- You guys ROCK !
Jim Hudson
Posted 2009-12-31 1:58 AM (#23093 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: RE: Bored...OK OK OK OK !
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100010010010
Location: Rocking In The Florida Dark !
Credentials of de SMF be da Boss.

Edited by Jim Hudson 2009-12-31 2:07 AM
SMF Cyndi
Posted 2009-12-31 3:03 AM (#23094 - in reply to #23085)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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20005001001001001005010
Location: Graveyard BLVD.
hahaha hey Marty, good one! Poor Santa...



marty - 2009-12-30 11:08 AM

Looks like Santa had a bit of an problem on his way home the other day - luckily he has another 360 days to get over it! ..........................................

SMF Cyndi
Posted 2009-12-31 3:05 AM (#23095 - in reply to #23081)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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20005001001001001005010
Location: Graveyard BLVD.


funny one Limey! I like your new avatar photo too!


Edited by SMF Cyndi 2009-12-31 3:05 AM
SMF Cyndi
Posted 2009-12-31 5:29 AM (#23098 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: T-G-I-F vs. S-H-I-T
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20005001001001001005010
Location: Graveyard BLVD.


T-G-I-F vs. S-H-I-T

A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright, "T-G-I-F."

He smiled at her and replied, "S-H-I-T."

She looked puzzled and repeated, "T-G-I-F," more slowly.

He again answered, "S-H-I-T."

The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly, "T-G-I-F."

The man smiled back to her and once again, "S-H-I-T."

The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain.

'T-G-I-F' means 'Thank Goodness It's Friday.' Get it, duuhhh?"

The man answered, "'S-H-I-T' means 'Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday.'"

***************************************************************************************

A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"

***************************************************************************************


Two campers are walking through the woods when a huge brown bear suddenly appears in the clearing about 50 feet in front of them. The bear sees the campers and begins to head toward them. The first guys drops his backpack, digs out a pair of sneakers, and frantically begins to put them on. The second guys says, "What are you doing? Sneakers won’t help you outrun that bear." "I don't need to outrun the bear," the first guy says. "I just need to outrun you."




Edited by SMF Cyndi 2009-12-31 5:29 AM
Lorndog
Posted 2009-12-31 7:28 AM (#23101 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: RE: Bored...
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Extreme SMF

Posts: 155
10050
Location: SCOTLAND
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE WALKS INTO A PUB.
THE BOSSMAN POINTS TO THE DOOR AND SAYS,
"GET OUT! YOUR BARD!"
Jim Hudson
Posted 2010-01-02 3:12 AM (#23117 - in reply to #22755)
Subject: Jokes aew fsnytastic, and enlihjy unlighten the SOUL !
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100010010010
Location: Rocking In The Florida Dark !
Mt Tuest wish for the new yeare is that nothing but in deede facts ) Truth is spoken-- In our time od nee BRS od DSB dramma has little meaning -- My nearears resolution is ti try and be free of substances and ythat those whom would slam Me would for reavaluate things id the opst. Such a shame in life to see the " BE " in peopled l Honestty and being youyself is a greatthin- To mne deseprtiv practices- have no lPlase or meaning- these aere the trully wasteed lifes in the world lifes in this onderfull - Be honest for god sake -- If you have something to say-- say it-- Id reather loose a friend that he BS'ed to --well I need that with the trouj m-,A MNF 1 wimm alleays try yo be trus to , as othrer may be fair werthrer friends is my most inoortan attse in kge-- Plesse god lte me have it !
LIMES
Posted 2010-01-02 4:18 PM (#23119 - in reply to #23117)
Subject: RE: Jokes aew fsnytastic, and enlihjy unlighten the SOUL !
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10010050

Um... Jim?- are You drunk? I don't know what the heck you are talking about! LOL.

Now I know how JJ French & Mike Altini felt when I used to write to Cherokee in 'Cockney ryme slang!! LMAO.

LIMES
Posted 2010-01-03 2:10 AM (#23123 - in reply to #23098)
Subject: RE: T-G-I-F vs. S-H-I-T
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10010050

Coded Message

Osmana bin Laden sent Mr Bush a coded message to let him know he’s still alive:
-3 7 0 H S S V-
-0 7 7 3 H-
Bush is baffled even the FBI, CIA & NASA can’t decipher it.
They ask Britains MI-6 for help. MI-6 replies “tell the president he’s holding it upside down”!
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